peek-a-boo !

peek-a-boo ! no more.

2007-11-15T14:20:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Perplexed
Currently listening to: Lose My Breath - Destiny's Child

I'm sorry.
I'm no longer blogging here.
Click here instead.
Thanks.

xoxo

raisin.

2007-11-07T16:28:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Dehydrated
Currently listening to: Right Here Waiting - Richard Marx

Hello, I'm at my faculty's library.
I have been here since 8 am.
I haven't had anything to eat.
I haven't had a sip of water to drink since morning.
It's so freaking cold in here that I feel like a dried raisin.

The good thing is my group and I have managed to complete most of our project site work.
I did most of the chapters 4, 5, 6 plus the presentation slides.
Feeling slightly relieved.
And hungry.
We're going to grab something to eat together later before I head back to Gombak.

xoxo

never ending.

2007-11-06T23:56:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Confused
Currently listening to: Breaking My Heart - Aqualung

Exams are over.
On the whole it was such a torture. Almost every paper sucked.
Honestly, I don't even feel liberated. Not even a little bit.
Well, this might also be due to the fact that I have my research presentation next Monday. And my project site presentation and report submission next Wednesday.
Crappy, huh ?
I'm supposed to on my holidays already !
The only thing that's consoling me is that the realization that I have just one more semester to go.
This always seemed to me like a never ending journey.

But I still wanna do my Masters.

Watched Drumline with the sister just now.
I have some photos that I wanna upload and a few stories to share here but I'm too tired right now.
I'd still have to wake up early and head to Shah Alam tomorrow for my project site discussion.
Sigh. I thought I could get my 15 hours of sleep once my exams are done.

I'm off to bed now.
Goodnight.

xoxo

i had a lizard in my hair.

2007-11-06T03:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: Silent Sea - KT Tunstall

I just got out of the toilet where a lizard decided to land on my hair before dropping on the floor.
Hmm. It did have cool green and black patterns on it though.

Eh, this is not a sign of bad luck right ?
I'd be sitting for my Pharmacoepidemiology paper in about 10 hours time okay.

xoxo

money.

2007-11-03T13:57:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Pissed
Currently listening to: I Don't Want To - Toni Braxton

What is the fucking matter with you ?
What's so difficult ? Can't you just go, out of respect ?
Do you realize you're giving a bad impression of yourself if you decide against going ?
And it reflects on us.
Fuck !

I really don't get you sometimes.

How would you feel if I were to blurt out what you did ?
To make things worse it just seemed that you were trying to disregard how I felt.
Funny, huh ?
I wasn't asleep. I turned off my phone.
I guess it's not so funny anymore, isn't it ?

Ice cream doesn't always fix things.

You, I miss you.
I didn't think you'd be gone this long.

xoxo

five things.

2007-11-03T02:00:00.001+08:00

Currently feeling: Contemplative
Currently listening to: Not Myself - John Mayer

Consuela dear, I'm so sorry it tool me quite some time to do this ! Heeee.
So yeah, I was tagged !

5 THINGS FOUND IN MY BAG
: My Nokia
: My Nikon
: Tissue
: Dettol waterless hand sanitizer
: Mascara

5 THINGS FOUND IN MY WALLET
: ATM cards
: Cash
: Tonnes of receipts !
: Two of Mummy's old passport photos
: Putra LRT Stored Value Ticket

5 THINGS FOUND IN MY ROOM
: Two beds
: Life-sized Winnie The Pooh
: TV
: A board with photos of family and close friends
: Radio

5 THINGS I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO
: Go on a holiday abroad all by myself
: Get married
: Go bungee jumping !
: Learn Yoga
: Sing and perform

5 THINGS I'M CURRENTLY INTO
: Facebook yo !
: Watching old romantic comedies
: Chace Crawford (yummy !)
: Eating like there's no tomorrow
: Pharmacoepidemiology (haha)

I'm not in the mood to tag anyone.
Feel free to do this if you guys want to okay ?

xoxo

cassie.

2007-11-03T01:45:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Contemplative
Currently listening to: Private Party - India.Arie

I'm sorry but I did not find it funny. At all.

xoxo

candy man turns 63 !

2007-11-01T00:05:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Like Giving Up
Currently listening to: Bliss - Mariah Carey

HAPPY BIRRRRTHHHHDAY DADDY !
Semoga panjang umur, and dimurahkan rezeki always. Aamin.

Stay handsome.

Promise me you'll be around until you get to see my children's children, okay ?

I LOVE YOU !

xoxo

tubby rank.

2007-10-30T20:30:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Stuffed
Currently listening to: Daddy and Marlene talking

It's like this never ending cycle and you're going downhill. Never uphill.

xoxo

biological clock.

2007-10-30T16:11:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Whacked
Currently listening to: Moody's Mood For Love - Amy Winehouse

Pharmacoinformatics was not bad. Alhamdulillah.

On the LRT on the way back, I came across, in my opinion, the second cutest/prettiest little toddler I have ever seen in my entire life. The first of course, (in my opinion again) is Tom Cruise's offspring, Suri ! The little baby was sitting on her mother's lap, she had huge round eyes, a cute button nose, chubby rosy cheeks, brown curly hair and the most adorable smile ever ! What made her even more irresistible was the fact that she was yawning non stop. Haha. Almost everyone on the train were staring at her, smiling. Tersangatla comel gila okay !

I just know that a zit is about to appear in the place I hate the most, above my lips.
Hate it.
Ergh.

I want ice cream. Lots of it.
And I'm not sharing.

xoxo

thrill.

2007-10-28T23:55:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Rotten
Currently listening to: Time Is Running Out - Muse

You're not supposed to be afraid of those kinda things.
And I'm not supposed to make such a big deal out of it.
Yes, I am at fault for stereotyping.

Ergh.
Fuck it.

xoxo

bila rindu.

2007-10-28T23:41:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Rotten
Currently listening to: I Want To Know What Love Is - Tina Arena

Is every girl's handbag as messy as mine ?
I still have a few bus tickets from weeks ago stashed in mine.
There's also an empty tissue packet.
No ?
Didn't think so.

This feeling is awful.
It's like I'm expecting it to be something that it isn't and won't be.
I guess the sister's right. I just miss that comfortable feeling.
But for how long ?
I don't wanna spend my entire life missing it.
I wanna make new memories.
I wanna stop finding faults.
Maybe what you said was right too.
Maybe I'm just not used to your type.
Maybe I'm just not made for your type.
Is there such a thing ?
Who knows ?
This is so disturbing that I couldn't stop myself from crying on the LRT back from Shah Alam this afternoon.
Not to mention, my fucking sucky Radiopharmacy added to the 'pain'.
I feel as if it was a waste of my bloody effort of studying.
Ergh.
Hmm.
So yeah, this is very disturbing.
Sad okay !

I can't go on blaming every thing on 'that time of the month'.
What the heck, damn hormones !

Leg cramps.
Ouch.
This I can blame on my menstruation.

xoxo

656.

2007-10-28T14:08:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Rotten
Currently listening to: Marlene

What the hell was that ??!

xoxo

talk.

2007-10-27T04:25:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: More Than A Memory - Hoobastank

Sekarang saya mahu.
Macam mana ni ?

xoxo

of questions.

2007-10-27T04:02:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Off
Currently listening to: Shut Up And Drive - Rihanna

This is so true.

xoxo

i thought my life was mine.

2007-10-27T02:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Off
Currently listening to: Come Around Again - Jet

How come it's so tough to pick yourself up from off the ground ?
Come on, it can't be that bad.
It's not the end of the world.
~~It's just the end of you.~~

So, I don't get to decide on everything, do I ?
I believe I told you I didn't wanna talk.
So I was silent la.
Right ?
Wrong ?
You decide this time.

Time will tell ?
I was expecting more from you.
That's just the problem isn't it ?
I'm still expecting.
I believe I have not said my last goodbye.

Sissy.
There I said it.
You should be stronger than me.
But instead you're longer than frozen turkey.

Why the heck are you so slow ?
You weren't like this before.
You'll never make it through this way.
Wake up, ~~bitch.~~

Don't mind my randomness.
I am PMS-ing.

xoxo

did you hear my thoughts ?

2007-10-26T02:52:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sad (because I just looked at my face in the mirror)
Currently listening to: Seven Years - Norah Jones

I just got off the phone with Smelly.
He called.
Yes, we have a telepathic relationship.

xoxo

maybe while i'm dreaming ?

2007-10-26T02:04:00.001+08:00

Currently feeling: Lazy
Currently listening to: Catch Me While I'm Sleeping - Pink

You know what, this song really makes me feel like giving Smelly a call.

Unfortunately, I can't. As he's fast asleep because he's gotta work tomorrow.
I could just call him for a short talk you know.
But no I should not. He had futsal in the evening and he must be wiped out.
But I still could.
Could I ?
Should I ?

*stares at Daddy*
(Daddy is sleeping right next to me. No, I don't sleep with him. I just study next to him. Heee.)

So here I am, studying Clinical Pharmacokinetics for next Thursday.
This paper just give me the shivers.
Sigh.

I have Radiopharmacy this Sunday.
Will get started on that tomorrow.
Then it'll be Pharmacoinformatics on Tuesday.
Now you see why I'm studying for next Thursday's paper ?

Gila takut siot.

Marc sat for his oral MUET in Shah Alam this morning.
He drove back to Segamat in the afternoon with Linn.

I'm craving Spicy Chicken McNuggets. Oooh they're so yummy.
Yes, yes, apparently they're back ! I'm sooooo happy !
But sadly for a limited time only.
Can I eat them everyday ?
*batting eyelids*

*slaps myself*

Okay, I shall go back to my dreadful Clinical Pharmacokinetics.

xoxo

what's easier ?

2007-10-26T01:36:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Lazy
Currently listening to: I Miss You - Blink 182

A clean break is easier.
You can reset it and it heals, and you move on.
But if you leave things messy or things don't get put right, then it just hurts.
Forever.
(Joyce Moore, Little Black Book)

xoxo

and worse.

2007-10-25T08:09:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: Somebody To Love - Brittany Murphy

Crumbled into pieces last night.
It was thirteen again, and worse.

xoxo

reciprocity.

2007-10-24T21:46:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Tired
Currently listening to: There's Hope - India.Arie

I won't start.
No, I won't.
I won't start talking about the paper that I sat for a few hours ago.
I won't start talking about the sucky paper that I sat for a few hours ago.
I won't start talking about the sucky paper that I might flunk that I sat for a few hours ago.
I won't.

I didn't have anything to eat the whole day today and I think while sitting for my exam, 1/3 of my class might have heard the loud rumbles of my tummy.
Zana was sitting two seats behind me and she heard it.

Heikal and I had dinner together at Secret Recipe just now.
I had slightly burnt Cordon Bleu.

I raised my voice at a cat.

I know we're not supposed to see eye to eye all the time.
We're different individuals with different thoughts, beliefs and opinions.
I can't expect you to agree with what I think.
And you can't expect the same too.
But why do I feel agitated ? Annoyed ?

Do not do unto others what you do not want done unto you.
In other words, treat others as you would like to be treated.
Ethic of reciprocity, remember ?

xoxo

lemak.

2007-10-24T01:36:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sick
Currently listening to: Nothing

I am hungry.
Seriously hungry. Lene was lying down on my tummy and she heard it growling over and over again. Laparnya saya !
I had two slices of bread with sardine for dinner just now you know.
This is exactly why I am fat.

My nose is killing me. Ergh.
I feel a headache coming up.
My face is breaking out like mad.
I think it's the exams.

Did I mention I was fat ?
Okay, maybe I am not fat.
But I sure feel fat.

I don't know whether I am ready for my paper today.
I'm freaking out because I am not freaking out.

xoxo

omit.

2007-10-22T18:32:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Inexplicable
Currently listening to: Run, Baby, Run - Sheryl Crow

I contemplated for a bit.
A few seconds ago, I did it.
I don't know whether I need a pat on my back, or a hug.

It's sad, definitely.

xoxo

stale.

2007-10-22T17:57:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Tensed
Currently listening to: Look After You - The Fray

I woke up oh-so-late today.
I have a sore throat.
I'm sneezing every now and then.
And of course, it gets worse in the middle of the night.
Sigh.

I need my multivitamins.

Daddy has been sick for the past few days too.
He's better now though.

The Boyfriend has been traveling to and fro Shah Alam and Gombak, two days in a row.
Yesterday it was to pass me KFC, because I was hungry. I didn't want him to, but he told me it would make him happy if he sent me chicken.
Today, it was to pass me a copy of my notes which I conveniently left in Shah Alam. To tell you the truth, I didn't know that copy existed until Yamin reminded me of it. Heh.
He brought two bars Snickers too ! Yay !
He's really something, isn't he ? *heart smiles*

Clinical Pharmacy Concept paper this Wednesday afternoon.
I haven't really been studying.
I've gotta pick up my pace.
There's a whole lot more I haven't touched at all.
Well, that's nothing new actually.

Earlier today, I was told, "If you decide to 'cultivate' you must know who you're doing it for.You must do it for yourself. If you're feeling hesitant, maybe it's not right. At least not for now."

Hmm.

Check out my horoscope for today.
Click to enlarge if you're really interested okay ?

Ouch.

Just gimme a little space and time, okay ?
Someday I might call you from my heart.

xoxo

should i ?

2007-10-22T02:51:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy/Sad/Fat
Currently listening to: Let Me Let Go - Faith Hill

I am not gonna lie and pretend that this is not affecting me.
It hurts that you had the heart to do this to me.
If it was for the best why are you still here ~~in my heart~~ ?
What are you trying to do ?
Should I be thanking you ?

xoxo

mama pig.

2007-10-21T22:22:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: Nothing

Melissa currently weighs 110 pounds.
That's 50kgs.
3kgs more than what she used to weigh.
And 5kgs more than what she wants to weigh.

She walks around feeling like a fat pig.

Depressing, not ?

Hmm.

xoxo

you're still on my heart, just like a tattoo.

2007-10-20T13:44:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Melancholic
Currently listening to: Tattoo - Jordin Sparks

No matter what you say about love
I keep coming back for more
Keep my hand in the fire
Sooner or later I get what I’m asking for

No matter what you say about life
I learn every time I bleed
The truth is a stranger
Soul is in danger I gotta let my spirit be free
To admit that I’m wrong and then change my mind
Sorry but I have to move on and leave you behind

I can’t waste time so give it a moment
I realized nothing's broken
No need to worry about everything I’ve done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don’t look back got a new direction
I loved you once needed protection
You’re still a part of everything I do
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I’ll always have you
(I’ll always have you)

Sick of playing all of these games
It’s not about taking sides
When I looked in the mirror I didn’t deliver
It hurt enough to think that I could stop
Admit that I’m wrong and then change my mind
Sorry but I’ve gotta be strong and leave you behind

If I live every moment
Won’t change any moment
Still a part of me and you
I will never regret you
Still the memory of you
Marks everything I do...

xoxo

clutter.

2007-10-20T02:50:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: Across The Universe - Fiona Apple

Sorry.
I just couldn't resist.

Your Mind is 86% Cluttered

Your mind is incredibly cluttered. You have so much going on in there, it's hard to think straight.
Consider talking to a therapist. It's a good idea to sort through your thoughts, if only to see which ones are worth hanging on to.

Woah.
I am definitely not thinking straight at the moment.
How cluttered is yours ?

Feeling really lightheaded.
I want Nasi Lemak. With chicken sambal, please.

xoxo

you're on my heart just like a tattoo.

2007-10-20T01:59:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: Tattoo - Jordin Sparks

Have you ever wondered what kind of panties you are ?
No ?
Me neither.
But apparently, I am basic panties.

You Are Basic Panties

You are a laid back chick with a real natural beauty.
You can make unwashed hair and minimal make-up super sexy.
Men tend to notice you show the "real you" - and they appreciate it.
And while basic makes boring for some, it looks classic on you.

Which, is pretty true, if you're judging from the fact that I don't own any thongs or G-strings or whatever fancy underwear.
That's not too much detail, right ?

Hmm.

I submitted my final draft for my FYP yesterday morning.
Alhamdulillah.
Such a huge relief I tell you.
Exams start next Wednesday. I should start getting busy.

Sometimes you end up doing things that you thought you wouldn't.
Then you wished you could turn back time.

Nothing else is new with me.

I'm just tired.
And confused.
Very confused.

xoxo

yellow.

2007-10-16T01:47:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Stuffed
Currently listening to: Yanking Out My Heart - Nickelback

I feel bad.
Did I do/say anything wrong ?
Sigh.

xoxo

meet the friends.

2007-10-16T01:28:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Stuffed
Currently listening to: I Learned From The Best - Whitney Houston

I just got back from hanging out with my Gombak people yang tersayang. We had a great time, as always.
Oh, and they finally got to meet the boyfriend. *heart smiles*

Love you guys to bits.

So how's Raya so far for everyone ?

I spent the earlier part of the first day of Raya lazing around at home or in other words, sleeping.
We left for Kak Siti's place later in the evening and had the usual ketupat, lemang, rendang etc etc.
No Almond London cookies were in sight though. *pouts*

There was an England football match that night and Daddy wanted to watch it there, so the siblings and I took a drive to pick Linn up from her kampung somewhere near Old Klang Road.
The four us passed the time by playing pool at MidValley. Yes, Lene and I were in our baju kurungs.

Picked Daddy up at around midnight.

I was ~~making myself fat~~ at Sal's place on evening of the second day of Raya.
I told myself (and Marc, Lene, and Daddy. heee.) that if I didn't find any Almond London cookies at Sal's place, I was so gonna go buy myself one whole box.
How can I not have Almond London cookies on Raya ??
But yeah, there were none at her place either. Hmm.

Just when I thought all hopes were tarnished (drama, I know), Baby came to the rescue !
Heikal, Lene and I spent the night of our second day of Raya at Baby's place.
Which was so much fun okay. We talked, ~~mengumpat~~ and laughed non stop.
Plus, she didn't only have Almond London cookies okay, there was also chocolate cake. Oh so yummy !
Baby, you rock !
Tapi tak rock sangat la because tak snap pictures at all okay.
How could that have possibly happened ha ? *pouts*

Oh oh, Heikal, you're hot right ?
*nods*

ROFL.

Sorry sayang, I just had to.

ROFL.

My submission date for my FYP is this Friday. Since I've been home, I haven't done a single thing. Zero. Nada. Not even study for my exams.
Shall try to do something tomorrow.
I have to.

I have a feeling this huge zit on my cheek will be here for quite some time.
Ergh.

Goodnight people.

xoxo

cold.

2007-10-12T22:16:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Bored
Currently listening to: Don't Leave Home - Dido

There are certain moments in which I just don't feel like talking.
Full stop.

xoxo

it hurts to be ignored.

2007-10-12T14:40:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Disturbed
Currently listening to: Till It Happens To You - Corrine Bailey Rae

You're sorry ?
I don't think you know the meaning of the word sorry.
I bruise easily, remember ?
Don't worry, I'll try to hold on to what I swore to you.

xoxo

emily and zooey.

2007-10-12T14:02:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Worried
Currently listening to: 4 In The Morning - Gwen Stefani

Heikal, Lene and I had buka at KLCC last night.
Lene and I had yummy pasta.
Bumped into Faizal, Alice and friends there. Jumpa juga kita ek, Sugar Pie ?
Lene and I turned into hyper laughing hyenas, as per usual. Or as Heikal would put it, hawt hyenas.
Pictures up next.

I told you I love my sister.

This was candid. I so like !

He's officially one of us now.

poYo !

Mummy's grave looked pretty just now with all the flowers we put on it.

Aidilfitri's tomorrow and I'm feeling the same way I felt this time around last year.
Hint = not happy.

Sigh.

Salam Aidilfitri everyone.
Maaf Zahir dan Batin.
Hope all of you have a meaningful Raya this year.

xoxo

outside.

2007-10-12T03:00:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: Outside - Mariah Carey

It's hard to explain
Inherently it's just always been strange
Neither here nor there
Always somewhat out of place everywhere
Ambiguous
Without a sense of belonging to touch
Somewhere halfway
Feeling there's no one completely the same

Standing alone
Eager to just
Believe it's good enough to be what
You really are
But in your heart
Uncertainty forever lies
And you'll always be
Somewhere on the
Outside

Early on, you face
The realization you don't
have a space
Where you fit in
And recognize you
Were born to exist

And it's hard
And it's hard
And it's hard

Irreversibly
Falling in between
And it's hard
And it's hard
To be understood
As you are
As you are
Oh, and God knows
That you're standing on your own
Blind and unguided
Into a world divided
You're thrown
Where you're never quite the same
Although you try-try and try
To tell yourself
You really are
But in your heart-uncertainty forever lies
And you'll always be
Somewhere on the outside

xoxo

somebody's somebody.

2007-10-11T02:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Okay
Currently listening to: If Everyone Cared - Nickelback

I had a nice long talk on the phone with Heikal just now. *heart smiles*
Watched Just Married on my lappie with the sister earlier. I don't know why I really love that movie.
The brother worked today and came back pretty late. Poor him, he must be so tired.

I just finished a bottle of asam jawa juice.
I'm craving pasta.

I'm so so proud of Faiz.
A champion in my heart, no matter what.
I miss chatting with him.
Sigh.

It's nice to be home.

xoxo

flash.

2007-10-10T02:55:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Distressed and Antisocial
Currently listening to: World - Five For Fighting

I have always had this difficulty saying no.
So I end up doing certain things half-heartedly.
Why do I choose to complicate things ?
Why do I choose to suffer the consequences by myself ?
When it is certainly easier if I had just said no if I really didn't want to do it.
I don't think there is a point of doing anything if your heart isn't in it.

My housemate, Atia's bag was stolen last week while she was having dinner at SACC.
It was some sort of a pukau incident.
And she lost her money and phone.
It seems that nowadays we can't even have a decent dinner without worrying about things like that happening, can we ?
Sigh.

What is this world is becoming into ?
No kids can play freely in the playground or even walk to school safely anymore.
No one can take the the public transportation without having to worry about their bag being snatched or pickpockets.
Fights.
Kidnapping
Rape.
Murder.
The list goes on.

It seems to me that people now just enjoy taking the easy way out.
Tak puas hati je, bunuh.
Gaduh sikit, bunuh.
Who do these people think they are ? Taking God's task into their own hands ?

Regardless if you're 8 or 80 years old. Female, or male. It's not safe to be out and about anymore.
I used to walk to school, back in Hillcrest.
The worst thing that had happened was the random attacks of flashers at the lake near my house. I'm not saying that it's fine to have some guy flash their you-know-what at you la okay.
Nowadays I don't even want my sister to go to the shops alone. The shops are like a mere 5 minutes walk from my place.
It even worries me that the brother is out at night so often.
Sigh.
I pity our children.
My future children.
Would they be able to enjoy riding their tricycles or playing hopscotch in the park ?
Or would I have to lock them up at home out of fear ?

Hmm.

I want children.
I wanna get married.
Soon, hopefully. Aamin.

Been pretty busy these past few days.
I think I did okay for both my Clinical Pharmacokinetics quiz and Pharmacoinformatics test.
I hope.

It's a huge relief that my FYP is almost done. Alhamdulillah.
Zana, Nanab and I had our last meeting with Dr Lua yesterday evening. She had positive and good comments for us.
I still have some amendments to do though.
The three of us had buka together last night, at this new place called Nachos Nachos (?), SACC. It's fair to say that I won't ever go there again. Unless I crave cold beef steak.
Oh oh, being the gluttons we are, we also had cake after that !
Thanks for a great night, you guys.

Had buka last Saturday night up in Genting with Heikal's friends. We had pizza. Yeah, like we can't get pizza in KL kan ? Hehe.
But I had a good night. I think we all did.
His friends were great.

Us at Genting.

Dear Heikal, you touched my heart that night.
I apologize for how I was and thank you for being there for me.

Buka on Monday was with the ex's family at Concorde Shah Alam.
The food was a real disappointment.
The sister realized that I was a bit distracted that night and she told me I have got nothing to lose.
Hmm.
I guess she's right ?

I ended up having fever that night. I was shivering to the bone.
I would like to blame it on the food but I think it was due to the weather and, yes, the stress.

You know what you did.
You know you hurt me. You know you made me feel like a fool.
Thanks a lot. I guess you'll always be the way you are. ~~A liar. A cheat.~~
Hope you're happy.

Hmm.
I have to submit two assignments today.
Then I'd be heading back to Gombak. InsyaAllah.

I took this celebrity body type quiz, out of boredom.

You have Salma Hayek's body!

You're a curvaceous goddess just like Salma Hayek. Your weight is balanced evenly throughout your body, giving you a sexy, hourglass frame. Slip on something slinky and flaunt your shapely figure!

Other stars who share your shape: Kate Winslet, Ashley Judd, Halle Berry and Kim Cattrall

Hmm.

I chose to avoid confrontation tonight.
I'm sorry. I just didn't know what else to say.
Plus, I hate it when people question my decisions. I think I did mention that before.
But I am, truly sorry.

xoxo

marc.

2007-10-06T14:42:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Melancholic
Currently listening to: Best I Can - Chris Perez

I miss my brother.
I miss how things used to be.

xoxo

burn.

2007-10-06T13:35:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sad
Currently listening to: Burn - Usher

I'm twisted 'cause one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry

xoxo

jelly belly.

2007-10-06T01:29:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Pained
Currently listening to: I Don't Want To - Toni Braxton

Seriously, my whole body's aching.
I am craving jelly beans !

xoxo

0510.

2007-10-05T23:03:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Exhausted
Currently listening to: Dead Disco - Metric

They were all lies weren't they ?
Do you enjoy breaking promises ?
All this hoping should stop, shouldn't it ?
Why is it that I am the only one having such a hard time here ?

Why are you doing this to me ?

xoxo

mug.

2007-10-04T11:03:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Bored
Currently listening to: Wake Up Alone - Amy Winehouse

How can I have forgotten to write about the fact that the ex's mum bought me a baju kurung last Sunday night.
Before that, Heikal and I accompanied her and Mira (the ex's youngest sister) for buka at her place. We had good food. I miss her ayam sambal !
Mira got me a real cute mug. It was so sweet of her.
It was a really awkward ~~and sad~~ situation to be in though.
Hmm.

I have to always keep reminding myself to look for the positive things in life.
Hey, I got a baju kurung didn't I ? That IS positive right ?
Right ?

xoxo

it's love that holds us.

2007-10-04T01:37:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Loved
Currently listening to: Deciphering Me - Brooke Fraser

"Don't question anything that doesn't need questioning now."

"You're human. Crying is only natural. Not a sign of weakness."

"Don't let it be that you can only love when things are slipping away and falling apart."

"Don't worry about the love factor. It will fall into place by itself if it's meant to be. Don't try to fix everything"

"I hope too. And we won't let stupid things come our way ! Never ever!"

This is one of the many reasons why I love you guys.

xoxo

sailing.

2007-10-03T18:22:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Stressed
Currently listening to: Bye Bye Boyfriend - Fefe Dobson

I haven't really been in the mood to blog lately.
No specific reason why.
It's not that I don't have things to blog or talk about.
It's just that I haven't been able to bring myself to talk about things lately.
Eyh, so lame.
Hmm.

Plus, I have been pretty busy. With my FYP due in like two weeks time. Dr Lua wants to see it by next Monday.
I also have a few assignments and tutorials to submit by next week.
I have a Clinical Pharmacokinetics quiz on Friday and a Pharmacoinformatics test on Monday.
I am so so dead.
*stares into blank space*

Hmm.

I watched Hairspray again last Saturday night ! After having at Akey's place where I had loads and loads and loads to eat, that is. She finally got to meet Heikal in person.
So yeah, I watched it with Lene and Heikal. Yes, yes, I dragged him to watch it again with us.

Thanks love.

I have come to realize we sisters love snapping pictures in toilets. Or anywhere with mirrors.
I love my sister.

I had buka with Annisa last Monday at Marco's Pizza, Bangsar Village.

The both of us actually ate earlier than Maghrib, since we were both not fasting and were starving. Dengan penuh tak malu nya okay.
We had a good time talking about life, guys and chauvinists. Hehe.
She's leaving for Europe this Friday ! She'll be there for about three weeks. So nice kan !

We had creme brulee for dessert. Yummy !

Oh, which reminds me, I need to get myself a dress. Maroon in colour. Hmm.

On Tuesday, I met Diana, who works at Petronas now (yay !), for buka. We met after office hours and after walking awhile, we decided to eat at Secret Recipe, Avenue K.
I had a real great time. We can never stop talking and laughing whenever we're together.
I am so very proud of how strong she is and where she is now.

Love you lots and lots and lots.

And Dearest Stumpy, I uploaded this especially for you.
Gila bangga you dapat snap picture macam iklan pie ! Haha.

I have been pretty mean to some people around me lately.
Sigh.

I am having trouble deciphering my own feelings.
How ah like that ?

I
need
a
break.

Okay, back to work.

xoxo

just bloody stop it okay ?

2007-09-30T05:58:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sleepy
Currently listening to: How To Be Dead - Snow Patrol

You.
Stop giving me false hopes.
Why are you doing this to me ?
Why are your footsteps still all over my heart ?

You.
Stop acting/talking/thinking like you know me.
You don't.
You're gonna push me away from you.
Please think before you decide to say or do anything.

You.
Stop acting disrespectful to the fact that I have a boyfriend.
You're acting like an idiot.
End of story.

xoxo

stop asking me why.

2007-09-29T11:05:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Numb
Currently listening to: Just Like We Do - Eisley

I just finished one whole bar of Cadbury. Yup, I'm not fasting.
My menses are a bit early this month.
And I think I am experiencing severe PMS symptoms.

Woke up this morning to some not so good news.
Macam jatuh ditimpa tangga you know.
Kalau aku tahu siapa yang buat memang aku bunuh !
Sigh.
Will we make it ?

Lene made spaghetti for the both of us last night as Daddy was out. His friend treated him for buka. Japanese buffet okay. So nice kan ?
The spaghetti was delicious, of course.

Lene has a birthday party to go to tonight. Daddy's going to Kak Siti's place.
I should be going to Akey's place later and Heikal might be coming along as well.

Hmm.

My phone has lovely new themes now.

I need to cut my nails. They're long and dirty.

xoxo

what if i fall ? what if i don't ?

2007-09-28T15:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Numb
Currently listening to: Citadel - Anna Nalick

I am always confused.
I am always insecure.
I am always paranoid.

xoxo

kruskal wallis.

2007-09-26T11:41:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Relieved
Currently listening to: Take the Box - Amy Winehouse

Drafts completed and emailed.
Although I know there will still be lots of amendments to be made but, finally !
Alhamdulillah.
I deserve a treat. Hehe.

xoxo

rest in pieces.

2007-09-26T03:55:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Confused
Currently listening to: Rest In Pieces - Saliva

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine
You look so beautiful tonight
Reminds me how you laid us down
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
~~(let me rest in pieces)~~
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Pieces

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did
I'm in your reach
You held me in your hands

xoxo

scar.

2007-09-25T23:02:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sick
Currently listening to: Scar - Fefe Dobson

Am down with a slight flu.
Am struggling with PHM 555.
That's my research paper if ya'll didn't know.

Kepala otak saya berserabut la.

xoxo

through the dark.

2007-09-24T22:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Sucky
Currently listening to: Through The Dark - KT Tunstall

I know I know, this is my forth post for the day.
This one's pretty lengthy.

Before I start my emo rantings, here's a few updates on my weekend.

Lene spent the night here again last Saturday night.
I watched Flubber on TV that night. Hehe.
We went window shopping (a very brief one) at SACC on Sunday morning. We had a good laugh, didn't we ?

Heikal brought me out for buka puasa at Sri Thai, PJ last night. Dinner was good. Thanks love.
We watched Hairspray at MidValley after that. I ABSOLUTELY ENJOYED IT !
I was beaming the whole way through the movie.
The last movie which made me feel that way was 300 !
I felt like getting up and dancing there and then.
Nikki Blonsky was superb as Tracy Turnblad.
Elijah Kelley as Seaweed really rocked my socks !
I have never watched the original 1988 film but this is by far my favourite movie musical. Yay !

Had buka with Amyrah and her friend, Boy at Pak Li today.
Stayed to chit chat for awhile only as I had to get home to finish my work. Blergh.
There are a few things that Amyrah and I talked about that I really should ponder on.
Sadly, she is right and she does have a point.
Oh, and Boy is one funny guy !

That's how I spent my weekend.

Am currently still working on my last three chapters of my FYP.
I have my Therapeutic Drug Monitoring homework to do too. We have sort of like a presentation on some cases tomorrow morning.

Uhmm, in regards to this sucky emotions I am feeling right now, well, there are just so so many things on my mind right now. Including my studies of course.
Not many know about everything else that has been bothering me.

The thing is, I don't get it why people assume that whenever someone is sad or down, it must have something to do with the person's love life. It absolutely angers me when people make assumptions like that !
My life doesn't revolve around my boyfriend only you know ? And that's not always the only source of my dilemmas. And yes, my love life is fine, thank you.
How I wish I could tell the whole world what's going on so that I would shut some mouths up. But what's the use ?
Some might think that I just want sympathy or attention. When all I need are ears to listen and a shoulder to cry on.
I have learnt my lesson. It was last night that it really hit me that I should carefully choose who I go and pour my heart out to.
I was also reminded by Boy, and Pojie too just now.
One or two people who already know either just continue to act so oblivious of the situation I am in or worst still, just downright cannot be trusted. So I might have chosen wrongly before. Sad huh ?

I so miss Akey !
I need my Gombak people.

O Bryan, where art thou ?

I need chocolates !

Okay, back to work.
Sigh.

p/s: Thank you Cheryl Beryl. I love you. And thanks for listening, Pojie. Hugs.

xoxo

deal ?

2007-09-24T16:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Annoyed
Currently listening to: Mad Season - Matchbox 20

It may not seem like anything big to you. But it sure as hell IS to me.
So don't you ever tell me not to make such a big deal out of anything ever again.
Ever.

xoxo

loji.

2007-09-24T05:31:00.001+08:00

Currently feeling: Better than awhile ago
Currently listening to: Shut Your Eyes - Snow Patrol

It was really stupid of me to have shed tears over a ~~heartless bitch~~ person like you.
You crossed the line when you went behind my back and did such a thing.
Gosh.
Yes, I know already.
He's not like what I described him to you as ?
Oh sorry, I only barely know him. I only knew him for a mere five years of my life.
So what are you two now ? Best pals ?
Well, birds of a feather flock together don't they ?

And I can't believe you had the audacity to go around rattling out things you've sworn to secrecy to others.
How ethical.

You betrayed my trust.
And many others too I might say.

I have a question, who haven't you bad mouthed ?
And she is your erm, best friend you say ?

You know, I am counting my blessings.
I feel blessed for I do not have to call you a friend anymore.

It's sad I had to find out about your ~~fake ass~~ true colours the hard way. And at a time like this.
But, shit happens.
So I'm fine with it.
And like a true friend said (yes yes, I do have true friends you know), losing you is not a loss at all.

xoxo

bum.

2007-09-24T02:23:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Bitter
Currently listening to: Trouble Sleeping - Corrine Bailey Rae

She got hurt even when she thought it would have no effect on her anymore.
She trusted too much.

xoxo

ass pee ass ass.

2007-09-22T08:45:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Shittier than you can ever imagine
Currently listening to: Each Day Gets Better - John Legend

It's Ramadhan and I shouldn't be cursing.
But I spent hours keying in my research data into the SPSS thingy. Right up until 4 am this morning.
And everything's missing now.
So yeah, FUCK.

xoxo

it's still there.

2007-09-22T03:51:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: LIKE SHIT
Currently listening to: Stoppin' The Love - KT Tunstall

The test yesterday went fine.
Alhamdulillah.

This SPSS thingy is getting on my bloody nerves. @@%$^&*()#$^&&*))@##&^* !!!!

I should seriously stop eating.

I know we can't stop people from talking.
How do I stop listening then ?

My thoughts are all over right now.
I'm afraid I'd do something irrational if this goes on.

I miss Mummy.

Shouldn't have read the archives.
Stupid move.

Heartache.
Headache.
Backache.
Seriously, this backache is killing me.

This was a mistake.

Ergh.

xoxo

doubts.

2007-09-21T01:54:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Crappy
Currently listening to: Running Away - Hoobastank

Don't you just hate it when people question your decisions ?
Hate it even more when they question too much until I am compelled to question my own decisions.
The things that appear correct to you may not be right to me.
Let me make my own mistakes, will you ?

This might not be right.
And I do not know where this is leading.
Are you trying to tell me you do ?
You don't either. Right ?
So shut the fuck up.

xoxo

i shine.

2007-09-20T23:13:00.001+08:00

Currently feeling: Stressed
Currently listening to: The sound of the ceiling fan

Radiopharmacy test tomorrow afternoon.
My head hurts.

xoxo

chicken.

2007-09-20T05:52:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Flabby
Currently listening to: The Little Things - Colbie Caillat

Good morning people.
Am still not feeling too good, sadly.
I hate it when the tears get stuck.
Nak keluar, keluar je la, duduk dalam buat sakit dada je !

It doesn't help that I actually ate something for sahur when I usually just drink.
I had chicken.
Chicken's great and all that but I don't think I'd be weighing any less like I have been planning to.
I know I know, I should be grateful I have food to eat unlike some less fortunate people out there.
I also should not be complaining because it's not anybody's fault except mine that I have weak willpower.
Even Ina pointed out the fact that I have been eating, normally. Which is so unlike me !
Sigh.

I miss my Smelly !
Sobs.

A quick shoutout my dearest ~~Mahatma~~ Gan, Happy Birthday dude !

xoxo

cookies.

2007-09-19T22:12:00.001+08:00

Currently feeling: Blue
Currently listening to: Everybody Knows - Dixie Chicks

Had buka with Ina, Atia and our old housemates from Section 2. Our drinks arrived late. So late that our food were finished first before we took the first sip from the juices we ordered. There were 11 of us, and we ordered three jugs of different juices. Am currently experiencing a tummy ache which I think is due to fluid overload from drinking all three juices along with the air suam I ordered.

Atia, Yamin and I tasted the Raya cookie samples Ina brought awhile ago.
Yeah, she sells them.
Her mum bakes cookies.
Just like Mummy did.
Pojie mentioned that she likes Almond London cookies.
Hmmm.
They're my favourite too.
I so miss Mummy's Almond London cookies.
I miss sneaking into the kitchen to steal them.
I will never be able to taste them ever again.
And that sucks. Big time.

I don't feel very good right now.

xoxo

everyone believes in how they think it oughta be.

2007-09-19T11:51:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Bored
Currently listening to: Belief - John Mayer

You remembered.
What may seem petty to others actually meant and still means so much to me.
It's true when they say it's the little things that really matter.

It has always been the other way around.
Minor details kept in mind.
Let down by the fact that they just didn't think they're as significant as I perceived them to be.

I guess it's different now.
You know what, I think I can get used to this.

xoxo

french.

2007-09-19T11:22:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Amused
Currently listening to: If It Makes You Happy - Sheryl Crow

You were hitting on someone married.
You wanted to take someone to the club. In the month of Ramadhan.
The reply was classic I tell you.
You've got no class baby.

xoxo

un mes.

2007-09-19T00:19:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Touched
Currently listening to: La Tortura - Shakira ft. Alejandro Sanz

I am honestly not used to all this.
One half of me wants to stay.
The other half wants to run away.
I'm still trying to figure out whether this is just falsehood that I'm falling into.

xoxo

salt.

2007-09-18T20:58:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Irked
Currently listening to: Love Is A Losing Game - Amy Winehouse

People and their words.
Ah, it doesn't matter. I'm used to it.

xoxo

back to basics.

2007-09-17T18:27:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling: Confused
Currently listening to: Game Over - Destiny's Child

It feels good to be back here after more than a year of being at Wordpress.
I have always loved HTML freedom. Hehe.
Nothing much had happened lately.
Spent the weekend in Shah Alam. Had a hearty buka puasa with Daddy, Marc and Lene at Kak Siti's place last Saturday.
Lene stayed over at my place that night. We watched High School Musical 2 halfway. Haha.
Had supper with Heikal on Sunday. Carbonara. Yummy. I so like !
Went gallivanting at Putrajaya after that.
Sunday night was great.

I'm supposed to be busy as I have tonnes and tonnes of work to do.
I'm freaking lazy I tell you.

What if I told you I didn't feel the same way ?

xoxo

switching platforms.

2006-06-22T00:40:00.000+08:00

I have moved. Click here please.

so the holidays begin...

2006-06-19T17:56:00.000+08:00

...well, for me I guess. I have exactly three weeks left to appreciate every holiday moment. Cewah.
Sat for my Organic Chemistry paper this morning, wasn't an enjoyable thing to do.
Dear God, please let me pass this one. Aamin.

I bought a 1GB RS DV memory card for RM105 at Lowyat Plaza. I think that's pretty cheap. Wee!

No idea what else to crap about. I wanna transfer songs and install themes to my new memory card. =D

xoxo

and i'm guilty..

2006-06-18T09:26:00.000+08:00

Woke up to the constant ringing of my phone, it was not my default ringtone or the one I assigned for Papa.
This is what I got when I answered it. "Akak, tolongla kejutkan *** suruh dia call *** balik! *** call dia tak angkat. Boleh tak suruh dia datang Pejabat Agama kat ****** ni before pukul 10. *** kena tangkap basah!"

I was like, OMFG!
And I can't get back to sleep now, eventhough I'm as sleepy as hell.

Happy Father's Day Daddy.
Thanks for everything.
Love you heaps!

xoxo

Pembetulan : Actually kena tangkap khalwat, not tangkap basah.

away!

2006-06-16T17:40:00.000+08:00

Exam on Monday.
Busy.

Pray for me okay.

Love you all.

xoxo

weakling.

2006-06-11T21:52:00.000+08:00

Okay, I succumbed to temptations.
I'm weak.
I had five sticks of satay and a pinch of Lene's chicken chop.
Oh, and an apple and a pear.
Sigh.

xoxo

please buy a new one!

2006-06-11T09:47:00.000+08:00

Meeting Diana in a while, (yeay!) we haven't met since Raya.

A sister of someone close to me asked whether she could borrow money from me. How can I say no? But when I told the person close to me about it, the person made it very clear that I should not loan the money to the sister. Even made it very clear that if I do, we will never be friends again because according to that person, once I give in, the sister will always be asking for more.
I guess that person knows the sister better.
But, I'm still torn. Don't know what to do. I feel sorry for the sister. How? Urgh.

Am I the only one in this house who wished we'd get a new fridge??
I won't put anything edible in it. Yucks.
(For reasons why, please go to Lene's blog.)

Okay, I'm off to get ready now.

I'm starving by the way, but I can't eat.

xoxo

you don't have to change.

2006-06-10T00:18:00.000+08:00

It seems like everyone's talking about Papa being fat.
Like hello?
He is not fat.
Yes, he gained weight and is not the scrawny skeleton-like looking guy I used to know four years ago. (Woops?)
But he is certainly not fat.
I personally think he looks better now than before.
Bodohla kamu semua ni.
Even if he is fat, what do you people care? Bukan dia nak hempap kamu pun.
Gila.
Poor Papa.

To whom it may concern, please mind your own business la, and your own fat.

xoxo

he's exceptional.

2006-06-09T19:47:00.000+08:00

Exam results are out!
Alhamdulillah.
I didn't do fantastic but better than I expected.
A huge relief!

Marc did exceptionally well!
Congratulations to him. =)

I have to start studying laa. Why is it so hard for me to do such a simple thing?
I'm so damn lazy.
Don't know what happened to the old me who used to study gila babi.

I'm gonna start exercising again. Yes, again.
I do exercise, for those of you who think I don't.

Papa and I had steamboat at Johnny's for dinner last night.
We were starving so we ordered the set for four persons.
Orang tamak selalu rugi.
God, my tummy almost exploded. It hurt really bad as we forced ourselves to finish everything. Didn't wanna waste la konon.
Papa was on the verge of throwing up already.
The food made us drunk that we even tried to go down an escalator which was actually going up. *deja vu*
Which was quite funny. And embarassing!

Papa's looking for a place to stay next semester.
Yeay!

Should I move in with Sis Sal?
Hmmm...

Sayang, thanks for being my rock.
I'm sorry for being such a pain.

Love you.
And missing you already.

xoxo

huh..

2006-06-08T11:20:00.000+08:00

I'm not living up to the whole "not eating 'till i fall sick" drama at all.
Still makan gila banyak.

xoxo

no thank you.

2006-06-06T17:08:00.000+08:00

Currently feeling down.
Something happened but I would rather not talk about it.

She lied.
I can't believe she's back together with that son of a bitch.
Damn.

I don't wanna eat unless I'm really hungry until my tummy hurts and I can't walk properly.
Had enough of food at KK.

I sent my Nikon for repair a while ago at KLCC.
The lady said it will take one or two months because they'd have to send it to the factory.
Bullshit.

It's freezing here.

xoxo

home.

2006-06-05T23:03:00.001+08:00

Hello, I'm back.
Sabah was amazing. =)
Spent the first two nights in Berjaya Palace Hotel in KK which was okay.
Then we were at Nexus, Karambunai which was like heaven.
We spent the last two nights at Beverly Hotel.
Six days was definitely not enough to enjoy all of Sabah's splendours plus Mummy's health which did not permit her to walk for long hours, but still we managed to go to the Phillipine Market, the Sabah Museum, Kinabalu Park and Centrepoint Sabah.
Also met up with Alice and had fun!
Bought a few bangles and earrings for myself. And some other stuff.
Sabah has made me fatter. Honest. You can ask Lene if you don't believe me. Buffet breakfast everyday is no good.
Pretty tired now.
Pictures here.

xoxo

heaven on earth!

2006-06-01T17:55:00.000+08:00

We're in Karambunai!

Nexus ROCKS!!

xoxo

here we come?

2006-05-29T23:59:00.000+08:00

Will be leaving for Sabah tomorrow morning.
Mummy has a fever.

xoxo

today i'm sad...

2006-05-28T23:15:00.000+08:00

I am disappointed with the condition of my notebook.
Very disappointed.

It's sad.

I'm just sad.

xoxo

i want...

2006-05-28T13:07:00.000+08:00

Supposed to be in Sunway Lagoon today but Daddy did not approve of us going. Us as in Lene and I. Sigh.

I have class tomorrow but I'm so lazy to go.
The only thing that is making me excited is the fact that my family and I will be leaving for Sabah on Tuesday! Yeay!
I'm a bit worried though, with Mummy's condition and all. I just hope she'll be strong and would be able to enjoy herself there.

My tummy's growling.
But food has been like poison to me these past few days.
Had to control my diet so that I won't become like a balloon, especially before going on a vacation.
Sigh. I wish I was thin and could eat anything I want without having to worry about being fat.

Oh, Boon repaired my notebook and the short cut button is functioning now but I have yet to test the wireless connection.

I want a Creative Zen Vision M.

xoxo

some people are just stupid.

2006-05-25T23:26:00.000+08:00

Taylor won! Yeay!

I took my notebook back today from the service centre but guess what, the problem's still not fixed! Apart from having to wait for two whole hours for it eventhough they called me up yesterday and told me it has been repaired and is ready to be picked up anytime , I don't really wanna talk about it. It's just stupid.

I don't get people who have the audacity and think they have the right to simply copy other people's profile. Seriusly, sick la you people. Bodoh sangat ke kamu semua ni? Lene kena once, it happened to me twice and now apparently it also happened to Cheryl and Bryan. Bloody brainless people I tell you. In the words of Cheryl, "No life la these people, really case no life punya."

Papa took me to Shah Alam and back just now to get some stuff of mine. We were drenched of course as it rained cats and dogs. My roommate Ina said I looked cute wearing a raincoat and helmet. Yeah right. It was an oversized raincoat okay. I looked buruk. =p

I have a new pair of sandals. Very comfy I must say. I like!

xoxo

daddy's phone.

2006-05-23T22:35:00.000+08:00

Gosh, I'm whacked.
Well, actually I'm dead sleepy la. Only had two hours of restless sleep last night.

I bought a new skincare set today.
A set which I consider expensive and I hope it'll do its magic on my skin. *crossing fingers*
Judging from its reputation and the testimonials plus word of mouth of some of the people I know, it should work. In time.
It takes patience and discipline I guess. Something that I don't have much of.

I'm tired of looking of blog templates. They're all the same.
I find something really nice and turns out it doesn't show my blog title or blog description.
Or it has a stupid title. Or all of the above.
I hope I'll find something that I can stick with for at least a year. Or two. Heee...

Daddy's using a Nokia 6600 now.
He laughs when he hears his own phone ring. Haha.

Oh yeah, I hate show-offs.
Ipod tu bukan untuk kamu pegang atas kepala la dungu.
So obvious nak show off. Bodoh.
Okay, so I'm a bit jealous. =p

Wanna go to bed early. Gila mengantuk.
Night night.

xoxo

just can't help it.

2006-05-22T04:01:00.000+08:00

My blog had a makeover.
Even edited my blog description and my profile since I had nothing better to do.

It looks kinda dull doesn't it?

But I like it, so who cares? =)

Phew.

Goodnight.

xoxo

my daddy's funny!

2006-05-21T23:12:00.000+08:00

Saya begitu rajin makan ubat mengikut waktu.
I think I'm getting better. So proud of myself. Hehe.

Missed Lin's (Sis Sal's lil' sis) akad nikah today because I was not well. I really wanted to go as I've never actually witnessed the akad nikah ceremony before in my entire life. Teruk kan? =p
Anybody who's planning to get married, please invite me to your akad nikah okay? =)

I'm getting better (hopefully) but on the other hand, Daddy's cough and flu is getting worse. Poor Daddy. But he takes his medicine religiously, too religiously sometimes. Not even three hours after drinking a dose of cough syrup, he's already soo excited to drink another one. Of course the pharmacist to be (Aamin..) was there to the rescue la. =D

Daddy's so funny.

xoxo

again and again.

2006-05-20T22:44:00.000+08:00

I'm sick. Again.
Flu. Again.
This time with terrible sore throat and cough. Sigh.
I even have trouble trying to get some sleep.

My housemate actually said to me, "Mel, aku rasa kau dah berisi sikit la".
I told you guys so. I did gain weight when I was actually supposed to lose some. Makes me kinda stressful at moments. Seriusly.

Mummy was a bit cheerful today, her friends came over to visit with her favourite Yong Tau Foo. =)

Urgh. I really really hate being sick.

Happy birthday to my Lil Stumpy. Love you. Miss you.

xoxo

beyond.

2006-05-18T23:45:00.000+08:00

Today didn't go too well.
Woke up to some bad news.
The doctors said that they feel there's nothing they can do for Mummy.

I'm beyond sad.

Skipped class because of that.

Don't wanna talk no more.

xoxo

organic chemistry sucks big time.

2006-05-17T22:10:00.000+08:00

I have never left my home without my mobile phone. Never. But yesterday, as a result of me waking up late and rushing to be in time to class, I absolutely forgot to bring my phone. I totally freaked out in class, I don't know why, but I felt lost, it's not as if I can actually use my phone during class but still I felt so uneasy and restless. Sheesh. There goes to show how much I depend on that little gadget. Well, for one thing, I have thousands of reminders. Heck, without it, I most probably would forget to take medication on time, or buy something I need. Urgh, I can't live without my phone. Not even for three bloody hours. Damn.

Mummy's scan yesterday showed a recurrence. =( She has to go back to the hospital tomorrow. I have class tomorrow. Sigh.

I hate Organic Chemistry! Not to mention the lecturer is so not helpful at all. She gave us a thick worksheet to do, didn't teach us anything, and suddenly when she read some of the questions she gave us she had the cheek to say, "Oh, some of the questions are not relevant ya. But can you manage?". WTF?? Manage my ass lah. Bodoh je.

Papa got back his Playstation already. The repairs costed him RM200.
We watched Hills have Eyes last Monday. The movie completely freaked me out. I memang lemah semangat sikit. Heee...

My tummy doesn't feel so good. I think maybe it got a shock from the loads of eating sessions the past week.

Oh, by the way, got this from Consuela. Told you guys I was a lazy bum and a egoistic ~~bitch~~. =)

Greed:	Medium
Gluttony:	High
Wrath:	High
Sloth:	Very High
Envy:	High
Lust:	Low
Pride:	High

Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz.

xoxo

mummy, i do love you.

2006-05-14T23:39:00.000+08:00

Dearest Mummy,
I know I have not been the best daughter a mother could have, in fact I feel that I'm the worst. I also know that I have changed a lot throughout the years and some not-so-recent events had somewhat put a sort of like a gap between us. I'm sorry.
But trust me, my love for you has never changed, in truth it grows stronger by the day. Even though we disagree and fight over things and sometimes I say things that I should not have said. I'm sorry. For all the nasty things I have said and done. And for all the times I never listened.
Mummy,
It hurts me to see you sick. And I feel so helpless because I'm not able to do anything about it. You might think I don't care, but I really do. I honestly wish there was something I could do to take the pain and tears away from you. I'm sorry. I take my hats off to you for being an amazingly strong and patient woman.
Mummy,
Thank you for bringing me up the way you did. I will never ever be able to repay you back in a thousand years. Thank you for the love and patience. Thank you for your kindness. Thank you for everything.
Mummy,
I would be crippled without you.
I love you.
Happy Mother's Day.

xoxo

selamat pengantin baru hanie...

2006-05-13T22:24:00.000+08:00

Just some photos.

xoxo

when's my wedding?

2006-05-12T23:19:00.000+08:00

Met Papa this afternoon and poured my heart out. Feeling a bit better now.

Will be going to my ex-schoolmate, Hanie's wedding tomorrow with another two ex-schoolmates, Firah and Wahida. Everyone around me seem to be either getting engaged or married these days. I wish I was one of them. Heh, dah menggatal. =p

Sis Sal has not been in touch for quite some time. It's just sad to see our friendship like this. I wish I could meet Akey.

Saya nak sihat. Please. =(

xoxo

no notebook for a while.

2006-05-11T23:53:00.000+08:00

I miss my notebook already. It's at the service centre, hopefully not for too long.

"Sometimes the closest people hurt you the most". I most certainly witnessed that today. Sigh.

I'm fat. I am. I wannabe like Nicole Richie.

Pukul dua pagi nanti saya kena makan ubat. Benci lah.

Oh, I have Fotopages. Hmm...

I miss my Papa.

xoxo

connection...

2006-05-11T01:51:00.000+08:00

So I survived two days without the internet. I had to, as our modem went kaput all because of the lightning last Tuesday. Not only the modem, our amplifier, the other PC, and even the network card in the PC was defunct. Gila la.
My cousin Boon came just now to replace the modem and the network card plus repair the PC upstairs. Now we have a new router with four ports so both PCs and my notebook can go online at the same time. Woohoo!
Will be going to repair my notebook's tomorrow, I hope.
Poor Papa, apparently the lightning also affected his Playstation 2. He was pretty sad, I hope it can be fixed though.
FYI, zit is still present. Fuck.

xoxo

toothpaste and boobs.

2006-05-09T13:49:00.000+08:00

Okay, so the toothpaste trick didnt work and I'm still stuck with this huge fucking ugly zit. Sangat besar okay. I felt as if everyone in KLCC yesterday was staring at me in disgust because of it. Or maybe I'm just being paranoid. But still, it is huge and ugly. Damn.

What's up with guys and boobs? Mine (my boobs) had a fair share of ogles last night. Like, really, I don't mind if you look at them once or twice since I have a pretty full-sized bust which rarely go unnoticed, but to stare, gawk or even try to look into my shirt is a big no-no! Urgh. Almost slapped a guy on the LRT last night who looked as if he was gonna have an orgasm by just staring at my boobs. Guys will be guys I guess.

Daddy says I need to go back to the homeopathy clinic. Urgh. I hate medication. Which I know is pretty contradicting. Sigh.

My room needs a good cleaning up.

xoxo

just for a movie.

2006-05-09T03:02:00.000+08:00

Just came back from watching a midnight movie at this boring old place (yet again) with the boyfriend.

We were there since 8pm and had McD for dinner (there goes my 'diet'!). The movie was at 11.45pm, and clearly I got terribly bored waiting.

So, we had Frappucinos at Starbucks, spent a good two hours babbling nonsense and laughing like nobody's business.

I guess caffeine made us hyper!

And since there were only 8 people watching the movie, we kinda got carried away in the cinema too. Oh, by the way, the movie was "Failure to Launch". Yet again. =p

I love spending time with my boyfriend. And of course, I love him. =)

Oh, Marc's back. Yippie!

xoxo

home remedies for acne.

2006-05-07T22:59:00.000+08:00

Got the whole list from here. (Yes, I'm pathetic!) Am gonna try the toothpaste method (the first one) tonight because I have this huge ugly zit on my lip. Euw. Hope it works!

1. Put toothpaste on your pimple before you go to bed, should help reduce swelling overnight. Make sure it is the paste not the gel. One of the most popular acne home remedies.

2. Wash your face twice a day in warm salty water. This should leave your face oil free without aggravating the acne.

3. Apply a paste of fresh methi (fenugreek) leaves over the face every night for 10-15 minutes and washed with warm water. This will prevent acne, pimples, blackheads, and wrinkles.

4. Place strawberry leaves on the acne, the alkalinity helps to reduce the swelling.

5. Extract juice of one lemon and mix with equal quantity of rose water. Apply this mixture on the face and let it stay for about half an hour. Wash the face with fresh water. About 15 days application helps cure acne, pimples and reduces blemishes and scars.

6. Another method is to massage the face with the skin of lemon before washing with lukewarm water.

7. Apply fresh mint juice over the face every night for the treatment of acne, pimples, insect stings, eczema, scabies, & other skin infections.

8. Eat plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables. At least 5 servings of fruits and vegetables should be included in your diet. All acne home remedies should include a healthy diet.

9. A couple of garlic cloves, crushed and dabbed on the face 1-2 times a day. One of the smellier acne home remedies!

10. Home face wash for acne: Mix together 1 or 2mls each of the following: witch hazel, tea-tree and sweet fennel essential oils, adding essential oil of geranium for women and essential oil of rosewood for men. Mix with 300mls of water. Shake before use, as the oils will float on top of the water during storage. Dab affected areas with cotton wool two or three times a day. The oils will clean and unclog giving antibiotic-like protection to the skin.

11. Apply fresh lemon juice on the affected area overnight. Wash off with warm water next morning.

12. Use 2-3 tsp. dried basil leaves to 1 cup boiling water. Steep 10-20 minutes. Cool, and apply with cotton ball.

13. Grind orange peel with some water to a paste and apply on affected parts. One of the best acne home remedies.

14. Clean face with cotton wool dipped in rose water 2-3 times a day.

15. Mix 1 teaspoon lemon juice in 1 teaspoon finely ground cinnamon powder and apply on affected areas frequently.

16. Nettle Tea is another solution, this tea has a herb that has some curing power and really helps work wonders on skin problems. Drink four cups a day to get the full benefit of one of the most powerful acne home remedies. Get nettle products here.

17. Aloe Vera juice applied twice a day can greatly speed up the healing of acne lesions. You can buy Aloe Vera at vitacost.com

18. Another lotion that uses bee propolis extract may also be effective. Mix eight ounces of water and 11 drops of bee propolis extract. One of the acne home remedies which has been proven effective with many people.

19. Some herbal acne home remedies... Burdock leaf tea. Lavender essential oil (mix 1:10 with water) Tincture of calendula flowers. Tea tree essential oil (mix 1:10 with water) Liquefy cabbage leaves with witch hazel, strain and add two drops of lemon oil. Use as a lotion.

20. Ice down the acne before bed, by morning it should be noticeably less swollen. Works best on larger pimples that have not yet formed a head.

21. Take vitamin B5 and zinc supplements daily to strengthen the skin's resistance to acne.

22. Mix mint juice with turmeric powder and apply on affected area. Leave for 15-30 minutes and wash off with lukewarm water.

23. Mix some vinegar and salt in a bowl. Pour a little bit in your hand and rub it on the pimples. Soak a face towel in it and dab it on the bumps. Leave it on for 15-20 minutes and rinse it off.

24. Blend cucumber and make a paste. Apply this as a mask on your face and leave it for 1/2 hour and then rinse. This refreshes your skin and prevents acne.

25. Mix corn flour with egg white and apply on your face. Let is dry completely for 1/2 hour. Dip your hands in warm water and massage your face and wash off. This when repeated regularly gives you a smooth skin.

26. Mix sandalwood paste with rosewater and apply on the face. Rinse off after 30 minutes.

27. Essential oil face mask for acne: Use a mask base powder, such as fuller's earth or kaolin powder. Use distilled or filtered water to make a paste. Mix 1 heaped teaspoon of base powder to 3 drops of essential oil. Add approximately 2 tablespoons of the water in, to make a fluid yet balanced paste. Essential oils to add in the mask either separately or try smaller amounts together; cypress oil 1 drop, lemon oil 2 drops, sage oil 1 drop.

28. Mix the paste of tender neem leaves with turmeric and apply of affected area. An eastern approach to acne home remedies.

29. Grind some nutmeg with milk and apply on affected area. Pimples disappear like magic without leaving a mark.

30. Make a mixture of lime juice and rose water. Apply on face and leave it for 15-20 minutes. Rinse off with lukewarm water.

31. Make a paste by mixing 3 tablespoons of honey and 1 teaspoon of cinnamon powder. Apply this paste on the pimples before sleeping and wash it next morning with warm water. Repeat for two weeks, pimples will disappear forever.

32. Rub fresh garlic on and around pimples. Pimples will disappear without a mark with regular applications.

33. Mix 1 tsps groundnut oil with 1 tspn fresh lime juice to prevent formation of blackheads and pimples .

34. Ground drumstick pods and leaves and mix mixed with fresh lime juice, and apply on pimples. This is also good for blackheads and dark spots.

35. First wash face and then dab acne with cotton balls soaked in vinegar.

36. Mix groundnut oil with an equal amtount of fresh lime juice and apply on face. leave for 10-15 minutes and wash. It may be applied daily to prevent formation of blackheads, acne and pimples.

37. Apply juice of raw papaya (including the skin and seed) on swelling acne, pimples.

38. Apply fresh lime juice mixed to a glass of boiled milk as a face wash for acne, pimples, blackheads, and cracked skin.

39. Apply ripe Tomatoes pulp on acne, pimples and kept upto 1 hour, then wash.

40. Make a paste of roasted & powdered pomgranate skin with fresh lime juice and apply over acne, boils, pimple, blackheads and whiteheads.

41. Apply grated potatoes as poultice to treat skin blemishes, wrinkles, boils, pimples, blackheads, whiteheads , etc.

42. Make a paste of ground radish seeds with water and apply on face to remove blackheads.

43. Apply a paste of ground seasame seeds with water as poultice for inflammation of the skin due to allergies, skin rashes, and pimples.

44. Large pores on facial skin can be treated with paste of sandalwood powder with masoor dal.

45. Use an oatmeal or almond mask throughly to cleanse your face. Mix either oatmeal or almond powder with enough rose water to make a soft paste that spreads easily on the skin. Rub it on your skin with your fingertips, paying special attention the problem areas. Leave to dry for about 15 minutes and then rinse off with cold water. This is very good in getting rid of blackheads.

46. A solution made out of one and a half cups of hot water and half a tablespoon of boric powder is an ideal remedy for blackheads, Saturate a face napkin in this hot solution and press on to the skin, repeat twice. Extract blackheads carefully with a blackhead remover and sterilized cottonwool. Pat on an astrigent.

47. Honey is a great remedy for skin blemishes and acne because the honey kills bacteria. These are some effective home remedies for the treatment of acne and blackheads.

xoxo

how to boost my immune system?

2006-05-06T23:12:00.000+08:00

My blog has a new template yet again. =)

I'm down with the flu. Again. I need to get something to get my immune system running better than it is now. Not to forget that I still have low blood pressure no matter how much salt I consume.

Mummy's so engrossed watching TV3's Cerekarama. Well, at least she's happy for a while. Kinda promised her I would cook chicken stew for her tomorrow because she's craving for it.

I'm gonna have to repair my notebook's wireless thingy next week, before I start my intersession. Sigh, orang lain cuti saya kena belajar. It's for the better I guess.

Am gonna meet up with the Gombak gang this Monday I hope. Yeay!

I can't stop sneezing. And no, I'm not a "cute-sneezer" if you know what I mean.

xoxo

need a rest...

2006-05-05T21:28:00.000+08:00

Exams are over and I'm still having a headache.

Nanab, Zana, Sis Kerry, Lene and I headed to KLCC right after the exams for a lil' post exam celebration. We watched "Failure to Launch" and had a good laugh. =)

Pretty worn out now. I'm gonna get some rest.

xoxo

elated!!

2006-05-04T13:52:00.000+08:00

I'm ecstatic!!!! Papa finally got the offer letter to pursue his degree!!! Alhamdulillah. Yeay! Yippie! Hooray! I'm honestly overjoyed. I was already in tears when he called to let me know, but Lene told me to save my tears for my wedding. Heeee...

Congratulations my love, this must be your best birthday present ever! =)

xoxo

another birthday!

2006-05-03T20:44:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday Papa! Love you love you love you! =)

We actually celebrated our birthdays together last Sunday. We went shopping for our birthday presents, watched "She's The Man", had steamboat for lunch and went to Hartz chicken buffet for dinner. We intended to buy a cake but we were absolutely stuffed!

Met Papa again just now, we had pizza together. =)

Happy happy birthday my love!

xoxo

just one more...

2006-05-02T23:50:00.000+08:00

Mummy was admitted to the hospital just now to go for a brain scan as she was having constant headaches for quite some time now. Alhamdulillah, things were okay and the doctor says she can be discharged tomorrow.

Just had a tuna sandwich and I feel bloated. I've been munching around like nobody's business today. Staying at home can really make me fat. Sheesh. I still wanna lose 10 lbs before the end of this month though.

I have yet to finish studying for my last paper this Friday. In fact I'm acting as if the exams are already over! Been lazing around, watching DVDs, playing around with Lene, chatting and bla bla bla.

Okay, I think I better study now before I regret it later on. Hee...

I miss Marc. =(

Good night people.

xoxo